Scarlett Johansson Sextape?
November 03, 2006 at 03:13 pm
I've gotten the privilege to write about some great stories in my time but nothing tops this. Ladies and gentlemen, there is an alleged Scarlett Johansson blowjob audio + partial videotape out there. I never thought I'd see the day. The people from this website have a copy of it and are looking to sell it. Here's some of the info:
It all started when I was walking near the sound tent and my buddy waived me over, smiling and chuckling to himself. He handed me a pair of headphones and informed me that (the actresses) mic was still on … she gets into a vehicle and shares some sweet talk with a guy. I thought she had a boyfriend, but I don’t recognize this guy’s voice … There is some rustling, then the vehicle door opens … She reclines the seat and gets back in. Skip ahead, here is some more sweet talk, then some more rustling, then they start kissing and so forth … THEN, for twelve minutes and forty seven seconds, she gives him the sexiest blow job I have ever heard capped off by the words “Yeah, cum”.
Now the site won't release who the sex tape is of to the general public until they speak to a lawyer. The general consensus was that the tape was of Hollywood Hoebag Lindsay Lohan for obvious reasons.. who else would be skanky enough to do something like this? Then the website posted a few hints for those that had more curiosity. The first hint was that the actress is currently shooting a movie (Scarlett). The second hint is that the actress has a VERY distinctive deep voice (Scarlett). The last hint was a bright red letter A (Ever read The Scarlet Letter?).
So if this is legit, I will be the happiest man on the planet. If it's not, then I'm going to be a dejected empty shell of a human being .. and I'll go back to waiting for the Screech sextape.
Update: Some people have pointed out that the video could be of cradle robbing Demi Moore. The thought behind this is that she was in the horrible cinematic version of The Scarlett Letter. The debate comes because all of her movies wrapped quite some time ago and she doesn't exactly have the most distinctive of voices. I guess we'll see.
29 comments
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November 03, 2006 at 06:13 pm
This is the greatest fucking news ever! The only thing that could top this, if there was an actual hard core video made with her.
Though I have to say that, if there was an actual video, video made with SJ in it.....I'd be at the same time ONE of TWO of the happiest men on earth, but at the same time I'd be all saddened and heartbroken because it wasn't me that she made the tape with.
OHHH! Shit! That's what should happen....we should totally go on a road trip and do like a bangbros style tape, and get a video of Miss SJ getting it with us!
wOoT! WoOt!
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November 03, 2006 at 06:13 pm
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November 03, 2006 at 08:17 pm
I'm totally down with a Bang Bros style Scarlett Johansson sex tape. We could pick her up on the set of one of her movies and promise her 50 bucks and a ride to the airport then drop her off in downtown LA and laugh while we drive away in our pimp van .. then turn around and pick her back up because there's no way I'd let SJ get away. Banging her has to be worth AT LEAST a trip to the airport.
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November 03, 2006 at 09:34 pm
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November 04, 2006 at 09:20 pm
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November 06, 2006 at 10:26 am
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November 07, 2006 at 02:42 am
If this is true, and a full video emerges of it, then it's proof that God does exist, and he loves us very much.
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November 07, 2006 at 10:06 am
Scarlett is one ugly hoebag!!! Give me Britney Spears anyday!!! That girl makes everyone else look like crap!!! Even on her worst day, Britney is still one fine piece of ass.....WAY better than ugly-as-hell Scarlett Johansson!!! Did anyone see Brit last night on Letterman?!?!?! MAN, that girl's got it going on!!! All I can say is hold on to your men, ladies!!! Britney's back!!! I'd rather get a blowjob from Britney than Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Simpson, Jessica Alba, Lindsay Lohan, Halle Berry, Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, Christina Aguilera, Madonna, Angelina Jolie anyday!!!
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November 07, 2006 at 10:14 am
i agree britney is way sexier than scarllett because she an icon unlike scarllett.britney wore a sexy school uniform and made herself a legend,she smooched madonna,she simulated sex and masturbation onstage and is now a hot mamma!!!even when she had all the weight on her,and the bad skin and hair, britney still looked hotter than scarlett.i saw her on letterman last night and she makes both christina aguilera and jessica simpson look like gargoyles.britney,please put out a brand new record and put back to basics and public affair out to pastor!!!we need you!!!
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November 07, 2006 at 11:56 am
Why would you post a reply to yourself like you're another person? Nobody gives a shit about fatass hoebag Britney Spears. GO AWAY.
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November 07, 2006 at 04:19 pm
I have to say Britney's alot more appealing than Scarlet on many levels. And, believe me, there are alot of guys who still gives a shit about Britney, and she is not a fatass....she's thin again, and is getting back to her supersexy roots. Scarlet is a decent actress, and fairly attractive, but not nearly as dead sexy as Britney Spears is. Sorry.....it must be said. And what IS the deal with Dallas posting to himself???
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November 07, 2006 at 04:23 pm
OH MY GAWD!!!!!HOW COULD YOU BADMOUTH BRITNEY?!?!?!?!BRITNEY IS DA BOMB!!!!!SHE IS SO SEXY IT'S A SIN!!!!!EVERYBODY GIVES A SHIT ABOUT HER,OTHERWISE SHE WOULDN'T ALWAYS BE IN THE HEADLINES!!!!!THAT IS BECAUSE ALL US MEN STILL JACK OFF TO THE MERE SIGHT OF HER!!!!!DID YOU KNOW SHE FLASHED HER NIPPLE AT THE GRAMMY AWARDS?!?!?!?!AND SHE POSED NAKED WHILE PREGNANT?!?!?!?!GOES TO SHOW YOU SHE STILL HAS IT!!!!!SHE IS ALOT SEXIER THAN SCARLETT HOEBAG JOHANSSON!!!!!BRITNEY RULZ!!!!!
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November 07, 2006 at 04:43 pm
You're boring my balls off kiddo, it's not really funny, just annoying :\ Stop using other names just to back up your own shitty opinion. Nobody cares.
PS: Just because you can change your name, doesn't mean I can't still see your IP address. Go use someone elses computer if you want to act like a totally different person.
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November 07, 2006 at 04:55 pm
YO!! You guys hear?!?!?! BRITNEY SPEARS IS BACK ON THE MARKET!!!!!! The entire hetero male population can all rejoice!!! The hottest woman EVER is single again!!!
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November 07, 2006 at 05:04 pm
Mk, you've bored me enough.
deny from 68.195.20.183
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November 07, 2006 at 05:37 pm
lmfco! nice one smurf! wot a dick... skitzo.... seriously, any updates on this, ill let yez all know, ill scour the web for weeks if i have to!!!
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November 07, 2006 at 06:30 pm
The only update so far is that the tape has supposedly gone on sale if you paypal 20 bucks to the e-mail address listed on their site. I'm still waiting for someone to do it and spread the tape online.
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November 08, 2006 at 01:16 am
Haha, holy Hell. I put this post on the backburner and it erupts (by one guy). Also where the shit did 15000 views come from was it all because of fark.com or whatever?
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November 08, 2006 at 02:19 pm
Yeah, fark listed it then about 50 different forums listed it as well as a bunch of celebrity websites.
Out of 15,000 views; it gets two or three people commenting. Oh well :(
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November 08, 2006 at 03:28 pm
And one was an inbred child, oh well ya can't win 'em all.
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November 19, 2006 at 09:52 pm
Dallas!!!
Scarlett is classic beauty- she is the modern day Grace Kelly. Unfortunately Britt is like White Trash Beauty. Looks cute walking into Wal-mart, or eating at a truck stop. And anybody could have hair and make-up done and look 10 times better than Brit. You must still be looking at her second album cover where she's all teen-age "hot". Let it go Dallas... she's not all that.
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November 20, 2006 at 05:06 am
Scarlett is classic beauty- she is the modern day Grace Kelly. Unfortunately Britt is like White Trash Beauty. Looks cute walking into Wal-mart, or eating at a truck stop.
Bahaha, I couldn't have said it better myself.
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November 20, 2006 at 04:02 pm
Actually that actress Scarlett Johansson is a clone from original person, which has nothing with acting career. That clone was created illegally using stolen biological material. Original person is very nice (not damn sexy), most important - CRISTIAN young lady!
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I'll tell you guys more, that clones (it's not only one) made in GERMANY - world leader by manufacturing human's clones. You can not even imaging the scale of the cloning activity. But warning! German state 100% controlling all their clones spreading around the world, they are very accurate with that, they are still NAZI type disciplined and mind controlled clones, so be careful get close with clones you will be controlled as well..Think wise
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By the way, it's good time to congratulate original person (very very nice young lady) with birthday and wish the best and any kind of success in her life !!!
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November 20, 2006 at 08:54 pm
What in the fuck are you going on about?
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April 05, 2007 at 02:35 am
get this guy another rock...
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August 24, 2009 at 06:34 am
Do yot think that the celebrities and rich industrialists are the most careless about the environment?
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January 06, 2010 at 04:40 am
Most treatment for sex addiction is based on a cognitive/behavioral model which may tend to be mechanical and superficial.
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January 08, 2010 at 02:25 am
Hi,
Sex addiction is a way some people medicate their feelings and/or cope with their stresses to the degree that their sexual behavior becomes their major coping mechanism for stresses in their life.
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February 01, 2010 at 12:46 am
Sex addiction is just a poor excuse for male celebrities.
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