This must be a lie! Propeganda alert!
May 07, 2007 at 11:43 am
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May 07, 2007 at 12:56 pm
love that chick, want to have sex with her no matter how fucked up she is.
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May 07, 2007 at 01:23 pm
Go to Wal-Mart, buy some powdered milk. I've got a vial/pill holder on my keychain. I'll let you borrow it. Fill it with the milk and head to Hollywood. Bust it out as soon as you see her and tell her you'll give her the entire vial if you can fuck her doggystyle in a dirty bathroom while she's railing the lines. By the time she realizes it's not coke you're already inside of her and as she tries to shake you off maybe all the commotion will help you bust.
Try it. Might work!
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May 07, 2007 at 02:18 pm
Cocaine is a helluva a drug!
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May 07, 2007 at 03:41 pm
Seeing Lindsay Lohan doing coke is about as shocking as seeing Paris Hilton's snatch. I mean, we idolize these people to such a high degree that of course everything they do that isn't the social norm is going to seem ten times wrong. We have to remind ourselves that actors and... whatever Paris Hilton is are just people. And people, by nature, are flawed. Don't revere them to the point that you stop seeing that.
And with that being said, I'd like to wear Lohan's fire-crotch like a face-mask, while Scarlett Johanssan blows me with those big beautiful lips of hers.
And while we're fantasizing, Natalie Portman can play with my ass too.
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May 07, 2007 at 07:25 pm
Fuck that. That's a bullshit excuse. Their ridiculously huge paychecks aren't just for their ability to fake emotions; it's also because they have to be "role models" of sorts for the general population. Millions of dollars as a consolation for zero privacy ever again.
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May 08, 2007 at 05:56 am
Smurf, you know if you have the money these sons of bitches had you'd be snorting coke everywhere... I think? I would. . . I think.
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May 08, 2007 at 09:43 am
Hah, little do you guys realize that "Jude Law" is actually me!!!
No fantasizing needed on my end. And smurf if you didn't know Ms. Lohan and Ms. Johansson are good friends, very good friends ;D
I was going to send her to your place with a "birthday present" but alas I had not the foggiest idea as to where you live :(
Maybe next time.
steve, unfortunately Natalie and Ms. Lohan aren't friends...so I can't help you out with that one =/
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May 08, 2007 at 01:36 pm
You beautiful, talented, British bastard... I forgive. I'd be lucky to get a double-handjob by two crackwhores in an alley behind a dumpster in downtown L.A.
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May 09, 2007 at 03:20 am
Ran: Haha, I absolutely fucking would be ;P I probably would have River Phoenix'ed myself years ago so it's a good thing I'm not rich or a celeb.
yourself: That's alright dude. I've got a pretty perfect birthday planned out this year already ;X She's all yours man BUT I expect Eluid to get first dibs on the sex tape. It'd also be nice if you let bunksteve borrow her when you're done too. He's having a rough week.
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May 09, 2007 at 11:03 am
Let's stick to the important part of smurf's original post - photos of Lohan not wearing panties at nightclubs.
If you can help me find any no-panty Lohan photos I would love to see them.
And if you know how to set me up as a coke dealer in LA so I could meet her, that would be cool too.
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May 09, 2007 at 12:51 pm
smurf, I'm a nice guy so bunksteve she's all yours till you come out of this rut that you are in.
Also, the sex tape is in the works as we speak. I'm not entirely sure but I'm thinking of making a DVD out of it. The DVD will have all the special features: making of, director's cut, narration by those who are in the movie, and maybe a secret feature that contains another hour of sex...it looks like this will all work out after all. I'll be sure to keep eluid on the up-and-up.
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May 09, 2007 at 04:48 pm
Well... I can edit for you... god knows I have the experience and the equipment...
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May 09, 2007 at 10:35 pm
mike: http://www.egotastic.com/entertainment/celebrities/lindsay-lohan/
Scroll through the entries, you'll find a few ginger twat shots. As for becoming a coke dealer in LA, I'm afraid you might need to start hanging out with some minorities to accomplish that.
yourself: I will not forget your generosity sir! I'll even hawk copies of the DVD for you out of the back of my van. I think you should let me do an easter egg commentary track tho. Nothing will beat my horrible 1987 pop culture references in the middle of a blowjob scene. Pure gold.
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May 10, 2007 at 12:05 pm
"Nothing will beat my horrible 1987 pop culture references in the middle of a blowjob scene."
That's the deal breaker right there. You're in!
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May 10, 2007 at 02:42 pm
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May 11, 2007 at 06:24 am
Ohh come on......she's doing coke because she didn't have a normal childhood! I mean, the signs are all there....look at Danny Bonaduce for example. Yeah, it's her troubled childhood as a child star that is causing her to be like this.
Yo', I want to get me some Scarlett Johansson action. I haven't gotten laid in eight months! You think I'm joking, but I'm dead serious, eight months dude, that's fucking killing me.
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May 12, 2007 at 08:39 am
Scarlett and Lohan... I'll take em both, though I'd feel more comfortable doing Lohan if she reverted back to before the Hillary Duff battle era where she actually looked pretty damn decent... They both did actually with a little, how shall we say, 'meat' on em....
I'll take Scarlett though regardless. Girl is wicked fine.
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May 14, 2007 at 11:33 pm
I think the reason I dig Scarlett so much is beacuse she's not all coked out. Unfortunately that also means there's no way I can goad her into at least a knobber in exchange for a quarter-gram, which means I'll be doing what I'm already doing--jerking off to her flawless visage until my cock is a cold dead eraser in my hand.
As for the "Tears of War" video, I could watch that over and over and it would not get old. If my kid cried like that over a videogame I'd chain him to a pipe in the crawlspace.
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